Is it really the end of May? Really? The last couple of months are a bit of a blur. Sound exciting? It's not. No, it's no chemical or liquor-fueled high that has caused this time warp. I am working. All the time. I know I rambled about it in my last blog, but it's really annoying working so much. So, I'm going to complain about it again.

Basically, with working these two jobs, I leave home at 7:45 am and don't get home until 9:30 or 10 pm. Except for Friday. Glorious, beautiful Friday, when I am finished work at 2:05 pm! (Although I usually stay at the school until 4 or 5.) Plus, I have weekends off now. I had to reacquaint myself with the meaning of the word weekend, since it had been so long since I'd actually had one to enjoy.

Anyway, enough of that. I really think that all I need is a nice, disorderly night of liquor and dancing to cure my ills. I'm tempted to head back to the bar on 17th where I got quite tipsy and was hit on/flirted pretty heavily with an 8-foot tall black guy. HOT. 8 FEET. Okay, not really, but jeeeez. I think I cramped my neck pretty seriously while staring up at him during our conversation.

Actually, I have met someone who, shall we say, strikes my fancy. BUT, I'm still waiting for that inevitable moment when he suddenly changes into someone completely different and I'm left questioning whether I have the worst possible taste in men. It always happens, folks! Take for instance, the sweet, fun, intelligent guy who suddenly becomes a bucket of raging insecurity when things get serious and decides he would rather spend his days picking up orange-tinted STD-transmitters than have something real. That guy seems to be my "type"! Place one in a crowd of 500 and I will pick him out! (And probably become unbearably infatuated with him.) Really, though, I don't know this new guy too well yet, but perhaps that will change soon. I figure if I go into it with a "Let's prepare to be let down" attitude, it's then a win-win situation!

Anyway, my current focus in on that other love of my life, my computer machine. It's suffering with some unknown malady right now; I'm at my sister's house using a compy that actually operates the way it should! So, it's time to save up my paycheques and upgrade the ol' boy. I was going to do it this week (actually I was going to buy the stuff and my sister's boyfriend was going to do the work), but, the CBE, being the wonderful organization that they are, forgot to give me half of my money on this paycheque. Half. I couldn't believe it. Luckily, I'm getting paid fairly well, so half is still enough for rent, but it's still an inconvenience to say the least.

That said, I'll close with an excited burst of glee: my newest niece or nephew is due to arrive in this world in 9 days! A trip to Saskatchewan is in the works soon.

Yeah, I called in sick. I accomplished nothing today, but it's only 7pm, so my efficiency gene is only now waking up.

I've decided that three jobs is a bit much, especially considering that I have a regular school to go to now (YES!), as well as 6 extra classes to teach at night and on Saturday. But, have I quit my part-time job? Of course not! I'm just taking a month off until these 6 classes are finished, then I can go back to the workaholism that I love so much.

I considered moving in with a work friend, as well, but it just didn't seem right for me, at this point. I'm counting on having a contract for the next school year and, if so, I just may be able to upgrade my accommodations then! Saving $300/month would have been nice, but not worth my comfort and sanity. Having a roommate again just didn't appeal to me, even though I get along with this person well enough. I feel like the next time I move in with someone, it should be someone who gives me sex as well. ;)

Speaking of which, I have the great luck of getting to teach sex ed. sometime in the near future! Answering awkward questions from eighth-graders who are either naive or know way more than they ought to should be interesting, no?

I went to Saskatchewan at Easter. Too much driving! I used to love that drive when I was by myself, but I think it's worse when you're not alone. You can't get lost in your thoughts and aimlessly drive when someone is talking in your ear the majority of the trip. Plus, I don't enjoy being relegated to the backseat.

( Some photomographs after the cut. )

A list of recent events in the life of Melissa.

Reason for this format: It's a quick, spirited glimpse into what I've been up to lately.

Real reason: I'm damn lazy and you know it.

• An insane road-rager followed me to the bank and, when I got out of my car, threatened both me and my car with violence, while also using some colourful language to describe me. He had a beard, some missing teeth I believe, and drove a station wagon.



• After months of self-denial, I went on a huge shopping spree, for which my credit card will never speak to me again. And we were just becoming friends again.



• What did I buy, you ask? Why, nine shirts (plus one from my sister who decides she doesn't like clothes after she buys them), the new Nine Inch Nails DVD Beside You In Time, which I've yet to watch, the new Arcade Fire album Neon Bible, which I've yet to listen to in its entirety. Doesn't sound like much, but 10 shirts adds up quickly, damn it.



• Why didn't I combine the last two bullets? I guess I'm just feeling dangerous.



• It was officially confirmed that I will be the last person in my family to get married (which makes sense, since I am the youngest). My sister and her longtime boyfriend/death match partner are now engaged. I like to call them Jeckyl and Hyde, due to their insane "I love you/I hate you" weekly arguments. But I am happy for them because they really do love each other and I know they will make it work. He proposed in front of the computer. Ah, modern love.



• I received one valentine this year (excepting those from family members). It was from one of my students in the 3rd-grade mathematics class. It was pink and full of crooked hearts and she had written on it very carefully: "My heart is full of MATH, MATH, MATH!"



• I just realized that my sister is probably going to ask me to be her maid-of-honour. No, wait, she's definitely going to ask me.

Wow, I am good at updating this journal, no? My delinquency is partly because of my feelings of animosity towards my computer. Yeah, that's right, I feel rage when I look at it, lately. I had just nicely installed - or, rather my sister's boyfriend had installed - a secondary 40 GB hard drive, transferred all of my files over to it, when KABLAMMO, the new drive crashes. I wept. It had been fine for a couple weeks, but then it started making strange noises that frightened me because I knew the truth. All of my songs, my digital photos of family and friends, my essays from uni, my damn teaching materials are gone now. How my junky 6-year-old original drive keeps sputtering around and this one dies on me, I'll never know. It wasn't that old.

Now, the rational person may say, "But, Melissa, as a responsible computer machine user, you should have backed up any important files. Every hard drive crashes eventually if it is not replaced. You are the one who is foolish, not your computer!" Well, damn you. I know that, but do you know how many floppy disks I'd need for the important stuff? I have no cd burner on this behemoth! I've dealt with my trauma and have accepted that most of the files are replaceable. I can download the songs again. I have prints of many of those digital photos and can ask family and friends to email the rest. I have hard copies of most of my essays and I DID save several of my favourites to disk.

The teaching material is what upsets me most. I have copies of a lot of the handouts, but it was so easy to just open up a file and edit it according to what I needed. Plus, there were so many of ideas there that it was nice to browse through them when I was planning, not to mention the plans and materials I had gotten from friends and colleagues.

Anyway, now I have yet another hard drive, but I've not put anything on it yet. 80 GB just sitting there, laughing at me, daring me to save that next file onto him. Yeah, I'm sure my hard drive is a dude. Only a guy could trick me into a false sense of security, making me feel content, before recklessly taking everything he could from me!

Speaking of which, I recently discovered that it's pretty awkward when a friend of the opposite sex, to whom you thought you made your Platonic feelings known, tells you straight out that he has feelings for you. I feel awful, but I've been pretty clear about how I feel. But I can definitely understand that need for a last-ditch effort, especially lately. I have this thing in my brain which makes me try and try and try even though it's hopeless. I wish that extended to other areas of my life.

By the way, did you know that phrase "last ditch effort" comes from military lingo?

"The last ditch was, in military terms, the last line of defense. The term had begun to be used figuratively by the eighteenth century, when Thomas Jefferson wrote, 'A government driven to the last ditch by the universal call for liberty.' Similarly, to 'die in the last ditch' means to resist to the end; it dates from the early 1700s."

Here ends your English lesson of the day.

Well, my Christmas got off to a great start. Naturally I had left most of my shopping until the last minute, as well as a load of cleaning that I had to do before I left for Saskatchewan to spend xmas with my family. My last day teaching was Tuesday and we weren't leaving until Friday, so I figured I had plenty of time to get things done. I did a bit of shopping Tuesday night and was feeling confident that I could get most of my errands done the next day.

( Fun with Migraines. )

Yeah, I thought I had been handling the stress of the past few weeks well. Work, my personal life, the holiday rush, UGH, it just went over my head, I guess. But everything worked out, a couple of the my gifts were rushed, but Christmas was still great, and now I have a few more days off to enjoy. I think huge amounts of alcohol are in order for New Year's Eve.

Oh and the best thing about my trip home? Getting to see my sweet niece Sarah and finding out that I will have another little niece or nephew by next June! Yay!